Archive for the ‘Bridesmaid’ Category

The Wedding Party: Each Member And Their Roles

December 7th, 2010 | Rss Feed

You just started planning your fairy tale wedding and you would like nothing more than to include all your close family and friends on your special day, but you‘re not sure how. Here’s a quick overview of each member of the wedding party, their roles and some of their duties.

Maid of Honor (or Matron of Honor)

The maid of honor’s role is to assist the bride on her wedding day — to lend her support, be reassuring, alleviate some stress and to even be a shoulder to cry on. She’s usually the bride’s sister or her best friend. The maid of honor will usually host the bridal shower and organize the bachelorette party. She can also assist the bride during the wedding planning process by accompanying her to various appointments (dress, cake, venue, etc). She’s also in charge of coordinating all the bridesmaids on the day of the wedding — making sure everyone is on time.

Another one of her duty can be to help the bride get dressed for the wedding as well as helping the bride manage her train, veil and bouquet during the entire day. She will hold the bride’s bouquet during the ceremony. The maid of honor can act as a legal witness for the bride by signing the marriage license after the wedding ceremony. She can also make a toast to the happy couple at the reception — usually following the best man‘s toast.

Best Man

The best man is usually the groom’s brother or his best friend. His duties are similar to the maid of honor’s duties. He will lend his moral support to the groom during what is sure to be a nerve-wracking day, but he can also help out with some of the wedding planning tasks, such as organizing the bachelor party or decorating the newlyweds‘ car. He’s also in charge of coordinating all the groomsmen for the day.

During the ceremony, the best man can be in charge of carrying the rings for safekeeping in his pocket. The best man can also act as a legal witness for the groom by signing the marriage license after the wedding ceremony. At the reception, the best man usually is the first one to make a speech and toast the happy couple.

Bridesmaids

The bridesmaids’ role is to assist the bride on her wedding day and in the months prior to the big day. The bridesmaids can help the bride, or the maid of honor, keep track of wedding gifts or RSVP responses. They can also help the maid of honor organize the bridal shower and the bachelorette party. They can help keep an eye out for the ring bearer and flower girl before the ceremony.

Groomsmen

Groomsmen are usually close friends or family members that hold a special place in the groom‘s life. On the wedding day, they will escort the bridesmaids down the aisle, and they can also act as ushers before the ceremony starts. They will also help the best man plan the bachelor party or decorate the newlyweds‘ car.

Flower Girl

The role of the flower girl is to walk down the aisle carrying a small basket full of petals and look cute as a button in the process. If your ceremony venue doesn’t let you drop fresh flower petals down the aisle, the flower girl could also carry a small bouquet or pomander down the aisle. Another idea would be for the flower girl to carry a flowered wand with ribbons.

Ring Bearer

The role of the ring bearer is to carry the rings down the aisle. Usually the rings are securely attached to a nicely decorated pillow. The ring bearer and the flower girl can also walk down the aisle together. If you’re not comfortable with having the real rings on the pillow, you can use fake rings for the ring bearer to carry, and give the real thing to the best man for safekeeping.

Ushers

The role of the ushers is to help seat your guests, answer general questions, hand out ceremony programs or wedding booklets, and help with the aisle runner. Ushers can be family members (brothers, cousins or brother-in-laws) or friends of the couple. They usually wear the same attire — tuxedos or suits — as the groomsmen

Pages

The role of the pages is to help the bride walk down the aisle by carrying her cathedral or royal length train for her. Pages are usually a little older than the ring bearers.

About the Author: Nadine Elliott, freelance writer for WeddingMuseum.com.

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Common Bridesmaid Duties

April 15th, 2010 | Rss Feed

From Favors to Food: Common Bridesmaid Duties Let’s assume you’re here because one of your closest friends just asked you to be in her upcoming wedding. Exciting, right? Sure, the nuptials may be months away, but you still have a few bridesmaid duties you’ll be called upon to do. Depending on the bride, she may or may not ask that much of you. On the other hand, she could have a long list of bridesmaids’ responsibilities just waiting for you to complete. In order to be prepared for the strain, hammering out some kind of a timeline and responsibility list well in advance is always a good move. As the day approaches, the jittery bride-to-be may get a little stressed and hard to reach. Here are some typical bridesmaid’s responsibilities that may be asked of you. A Bridesmaid’s Responsibilities

  1. Buy the dress: One of the primary bridesmaid duties is footing the bill for the dress you’ll wear. Hopefully, the bride will have chosen something that fits within everyone’s budget. However, you’ll want to purchase your dress in advance in case it needs alteration work or something similar.
    Occasionally, some brides choose one style of dress – not an ideal situation for bridesmaids with different body types. Embellish your dress with a cute jacket if sleeveless doesn’t suit you or wear body-shaping undergarments for dresses that are too tight or too short.
  2. Assemble favors: The bride may ask your help with putting together or dreaming up the favors. These kinds of bridesmaid duties are a great project for all the girls to help with! Based on the wedding’s theme or colors, you can come prepared with some ideas in mind and share them with the group. If it’s more of a project night, bring some goodies like cookies, wine, or popcorn for the group to enjoy while you assemble.
  3. Organize gifts on the wedding day: Ideally, each bridesmaid should have unique bridesmaid duties on the day of the wedding. As part of the other thousands of bridesmaid’s responsibilities that have to get done, the bride may ask you to organize the gifts as they are placed on the table and perhaps direct guests to sign the guest book or answer questions about the night’s festivities and the venue’s facilities.
  4. Greet guests on the wedding day: Similar to the above task, a bridesmaid or two should stand guard at the front entrance, smiling and greeting guests as they enter. They should also coordinate these efforts with the groomsmen, who will then usher each new arrival to their table at the church, venue, or reception.
  5. Arrive early or on time: In order to keep up with everything that’s going on that day, make sure to arrive when the bride asks you to. It’s obvious it’s going to be a long day, but if you’re rushing to the ceremony or reception with ten minutes to spare, someone else will have picked up the slack and performed your bridesmaid duties alone.
  6. Carry the bride’s essentials: Managing the bride’s essentials is one of the most important bridesmaid duties. One of the bridesmaids should keep track of all the bride’s essentials. The maid of honor ideally attends to her train while she walks around, perhaps even arranging it for pictures. The other bridesmaids should have tissues on hand, extra makeup, safety pins, and whatever else will keep the bride looking flawless throughout the wedding day.
  7. Offer direction to wait staff at the reception venue: It’s a given that everyone will be running around to make sure the reception flows smoothly. Part of the bridesmaids’ responsibilities should include directing the wait staff in regards to table placement, the cake, the food (whether it be buffet or sit down), drinks, and any protocol. Make sure signs clearly delineate who sits at which table. Verify that the speakers aren’t too close to any one table.
  8. Collaborate with the other bridesmaids: The night before, create a game plan with the other bridesmaids to ensure you are all on the same page as far as each bridesmaid’s responsibilities. Assign roles and duties so that everything goes off without a hitch during the actual ceremony and reception.
  9. Ensure the bride’s dress is ready to go: Someone will need to be in charge of making sure the dress is pressed, fresh, and ready to go. If it needs alteration work, take it and pick it up. If it needs to be dry cleaned, make a stop at the dry cleaners as well!
  10. Provide moral support: Offering a shoulder to cry on or some friendly words will go a lot farther than you could think – and is often more valued than perhaps any of the other bridesmaid duties. She is stressed and tired of planning day after day – being a friend is the most important thing.

Carrying Out Bridesmaid’s Responsibilities with a Smile Sure, all these bridesmaid duties may be a lot of work and a little stressful to boot. Just remember that the bride decided to honor you with the responsibility of standing up for her at her wedding day. Cherish your bridesmaid’s responsibilities and take lots of pictures! About the Author Cherie Johnson is the founder and owner of Creative Wedding Favors, the premier site for unique special occasion and wedding favors. Her wedding ideas have also benefited readers of many websites, including Women Of, Wedding Lenox, and The Wedding Guide. Before establishing the company in 2006, she was a professional wedding photographer, chronicling all the special moments of the nuptials and ceremony. Search for favors for your next event by visiting www.CreativeWeddingFavors.com

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Bridesmaid Gifts that Delight

April 7th, 2009 | Rss Feed

Surprise Your Bridesmaid with Gifts that Delight

Bridesmaids, usually special friends or relatives, are chosen to be an integral part of planning your wedding day and to help make your day a little easier, which is why presenting them with beautiful, thoughtful bridesmaid gifts is vital. Planning a wedding is a time-consuming endeavor, and this is exactly why the role of bridesmaid was created. There are many perks to being a bridesmaid, including bonding with the bride on her special day and helping her make the necessary choices about colors, themes, food, and apparel.

The downside you ask? Being a bridesmaid can be expensive. Your bridesmaids must purchase a number of items just to be included in the wedding party – from her dress and jewelry to her travel expenses, your friend will have to foot the bill. And not only does she take care of the many menial tasks involved in planning a wedding, but she does them gladly. One of the most important decisions you have regarding each bridesmaid are the gifts you’ll give to each friend thanking them for their participation, assistance, and patience in planning the wedding day and the entire event.

Personalized bridesmaid gifts are always an excellent choice, but there are a number of other thoughtful items you can present your bridesmaids with that they will cherish. Just remember to keep in mind the type of girl you’re purchasing for, and by all means, don’t buy the same kind of ‘cookie-cutter bridesmaid gifts’ for everyone. Think about what each girl likes, and you’re sure to find something she’ll love.

Thank Her for Her Help in Planning Your Wedding

Here are some time-tested bridesmaid gifts that continue to be crowd-pleasers no matter the season!

A cosmetic bag is incredibly practical for the bridesmaid who loves her makeup and grooming tools. Available in all sizes, fabric options, and shapes, cosmetic bags can be personalized as well. Plus, they’ll not only come in handy later on, but your bridesmaid can carry her makeup here and there while planning your wedding and getting ready for your big day.

Nothing is more useful than a personalized tote bag. Popular in any season, personalized totes come in every color, shape, and size under the sun. Whether you choose a smaller polka dot tote bag ideal for running errands around town or a large canvas duffel or laptop bag, you can choose to have the bridesmaid’s initials embroidered on the front in a variety of different thread colors and font choices.

What’s better than enveloping yourself in a plush, luxurious robe? Few things are as comforting as a warm robe on a cold night, and your bridesmaid will undoubtedly love the little details, like her name or initials embroidered on the front pocket, and the cozy warmth of terry cloth or velour. You can also pair this gift with comfy bathroom slippers that match the robe and give her the gift of pampering so she can wind down from the busy time spent planning your wedding.

For timeless, elegant bridesmaid gifts they’ll be able to use long after the ceremony, you may want to consider the understated sophistication of an engraved compact. With different shapes (the classic round to the fun, contemporary heart) and finishes (satin, silver, and embellished), even the hardest-to-please bridesmaids will find compacts useful companions in their handbags.

Whether you go bright, bold, and chunky or dainty and chic, costume jewelry not only looks great but is wonderful for those special occasions. From hip, vibrant brooches to rhinestone encrusted hair combs, the bridesmaid who loves to dress up will appreciate a new or vintage piece of sparkling faux finery.

No longer an ideal gift just for a groomsman, colorful, feminine flasks are gaining popularity as bridesmaid gifts. Discreet enough to be tucked in a pocket or purse, flasks can be engraved and often come in more feminine colors and patterns, such as pinks, blues, and plaids. Your outgoing, fun-loving bridesmaid will get a kick out of her new flask and appreciate your inventive way of thanking her for her help in planning your wedding.

Stationery is always classy and always in style. There are literally thousands of card stock options, such as note cards, lined note pads, correspondence cards, and letter sheets, as well as colors and fonts to choose from. Personalized stationery is a professional, stylish way to say thank you or let someone know you are thinking of them regardless of the situation. Creative bridesmaids who love to write will certainly appreciate these types of chic bridesmaid gifts.

For the reflective bridesmaid, a photo album is an excellent choice to thank her for her assistance in planning the wedding day. Engraved with her initials (or name) or by simply selecting a pretty, leather-bound album, she can store her memories for years to come. If you have time, you could fill it with pictures of you and her at fun events in the past or leave it blank so she can make her own memories.

Finding a Gift She’ll Cherish

If you’re still not sure which direction to go, look to the bridesmaid herself to get inspiration for the right kinds of bridesmaid gifts. But most of all, do not give the same bridesmaid gifts to everyone; make it special and personalized and she’ll appreciate it that much more. With all the help they’ve been giving you throughout this hectic time, it should be an honor to present them with a unique gift they’ll cherish long after the time spent planning the wedding is over.

About the Author: Cherie Johnson is the founder and owner of Creative Bride, a one-stop shop for personalized, unique baby and bridal shower, graduation, quinceañera, anniversary, and wedding favors, helping countless couples and families make their big events a success. Before she launched the company in 2006, Cherie worked as a professional wedding photographer, capturing the most special moments of the bride and groom’s big day. For more information on Creative Bride or to find a variety of colorful, customizable gifts and favors, please visit www.Creative-Bride.com.

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When to Give Your Bridesmaid the Boot

March 30th, 2009 | Rss Feed

Your Bridesmaid No Longer Your BFF?  When to Give Your Bridesmaid the Boot.

by Stacy Dymalski

Anyone who said best friends are forever never planned a wedding. Just because you’ve known your bridesmaids since kindergarten doesn’t mean they all envision your wedding day as the same spectacular event you’ve dreamed of since you were 12.

Ask any Wedding Planner, and they’ll tell you that picking your bridesmaids is one of the most important decisions in planning your wedding. And even though you may feel obligated to choose someone you’ve known your whole life, you should consider the purpose of a bridesmaid before deciding who she should be. First and foremost, a bridesmaid is there to witness the commitment you are about to make to your future husband and to emotionally support you throughout your marriage. So if you’re considering a bridesmaid who A) doesn’t like the guy you’re marrying, B) doesn’t believe in marriage, or C) hates men, you might want to think about giving her some other ceremonial task, like managing the guest book. The last thing you need is a scowling bridesmaid in every picture.

Bridesmaids also help fulfill many of the small jobs that need to be done the day you walk down the aisle. In many ways, your bridesmaids are your ambassadors, representing you to your guests and the people you hire. So if you have a friend who sometimes forgets to show up, has colorful language, or likes to get tipsy at parties and tell embarrassing stories about your childhood, you may not want her front and center at your wedding.

But even with careful consideration, it’s possible to unwittingly pick a bridesmaid who turns out to be a horror show. If that happens, it’s okay to fire her. So where do you draw the line on bad behavior? Anything that resembles the following is just cause for the boot:

1. She misses important wedding-related functions like fittings, appointments, parties, or rehearsals.

2. She’s so wrapped up in the drama in her life (like a break-up, stress at work, problems with her children, etc.) that she can’t focus on her bridesmaid duties.

3. She criticizes every decision you make (but doesn’t offer any realistic options).

4. She tries to take control of your wedding plans. (Remember this is YOUR wedding. Her input is appreciated, but not the final word.)

5. She has a negative attitude about the man you’re marrying (and/or his family).

6. She makes changes to your existing wedding plans (like the seating chart or flower choices) without consulting you first.

7. She takes it upon herself to have her bridesmaid dress altered to include a plunging neckline that would make Britney Spears blush.

8. She refuses to help plan pre-wedding functions such as a shower, hens’ parties, or a girls’ night out. (Or worse yet, she says she’ll plan them, but then doesn’t.)

9. She tells your fiancé about your past 10 boyfriends when you’ve only told him about four (and he’s not impressed).

10. She insists on being the center of attention in any group of people.

It may seem obvious that these bridesmaids must be sacked, but when the culprit in question is your sister-in-law, a favorite co-worker, or a life long friend, guilt can prevent you from making the hard choice. Above all, you have to ask yourself, is my bridesmaid causing me more undue pain than if she weren’t my bridesmaid? If the answer is yes, she needs to go.

So how does one fire a bridesmaid? Start by making a list of her inappropriate behaviors and privately talk to her about each one and why it bothers you. If she’s truly sorry and vows to change her conduct, you might give her another chance. If she becomes defensive, take the high road and let her have her say. When she’s finished calmly explain that you value her friendship and want to stay friends, but that every friend doesn’t have to be a bridesmaid. If she chooses to sever your friendship, then ask yourself, was she really that good of a friend to begin with? Only dear friends want what’s best for you when planning your wedding. And let’s face it, isn’t that who you want surrounding you on one of the most important days of your life?

About The Author: Girl Friday Weddings www.girlfridayweddings.com.au are Personal Assistants and Wedding Planners are located in Sydney, Australia. Specialists in affordable part-planning, they pride themselves in helping out at any stage of the planning process and are particularly apt at assisting the last-minute Bride.

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Brides Letting Bridesmaids Make Choices

May 17th, 2007 | Rss Feed

Brides Letting Bridesmaids Make Their Own Choices

The days of the overbearing, control-freak bride are over! Everywhere, bridesmaids are rejoicing that they don’t have to wear a dress that’s been chosen for them (presumably after the bride has had a few drinks), they don’t have to wear their hair in a severe chignon that makes them look twenty years older, and they’re not going to be micromanaged anymore by a bride who needs someone to push around after her parents have pushed her around all day.

The new trend is to let bridesmaids make up their own minds about many aspects of their wedding participation.

I’ve been in weddings before, and the bride was a nightmare, says Sarah, a bride from New York City, who has been a bridesmaid six times for friends and relatives. So when my sister asked me to be a bridesmaid, I feared the worst. But my sister said that we could all choose the style of gown we wanted, she had no preference on how we wore our hair, and she had no preference on a bridal shower. Whatever we wanted to do was fine with her. I almost thought I was being Punk’d.

Sarah’s experience echoes what’s going on in wedding world right now. Dress designers are encouraging brides to let their bridesmaids pick out the most flattering tops and skirts for their own body shapes and comfort levels, which makes bridesmaids very happy. They can make their own style and budget choices, as long as they stick to the color and designer chosen by the bride. And even that is up for grabs these days. Sharon Naylor, author of The Bridesmaid Handbook and a PashWeddings.com resident wedding expert, is planning her own wedding right now. I just told my Matron of Honor that she can pick out any dress style she wants for herself and for the bridesmaids, as long as it’s full-length and formal. Our wedding colors are green and white, so I let Jill “ who is an artist “ decide between the moss, celery, hunter and every other variation of green on there. It’s not a decision I have to control. Jill chose three possibilities so far, and I love them all. She gets to pick the final design.

A bridesmaid who can choose her own dress is a happy bridesmaid, and will wear the dress again in the future. It’s even become a trend to have bridesmaids in coordinating shades of a color. Some brides with fairer skin might love a brighter color, while bridesmaids with darker skin might love a different shade. It still makes for lovely photos and personal presence when the bridesmaids are in a range of colors. Look at the shades of orange leaves in an autumn tree, for instance, says Sharon Naylor. They’re not exactly the same hue, but it works.”

The same applies to hairstyle. Today’s brides are no longer so controlling that they demand their bridesmaids get the exact same updo to make them a matching set. I just saw this on My Super Sweet Sixteen, where the birthday girl insisted on uniform French braids and threw a fit when the braids were not to her exact specifications. No bride wants to be like that anymore, says Naylor. Now, brides assure their bridesmaids that they can wear their hair any way they like. They might ask for an updo, but it’s the bridesmaids’ choices of updo. We’re far from the days when brides demanded that their bridesmaids order $200 hair extensions ˜to give the image I’m looking for.

And for shoes, brides may only go as far as saying, Wear silver heels with an open to give a uniformity in the wedding photos. They’re not choosing a designer, model number, price, and dye job order and sending their bridesmaids a˜you must buy this by Thursday’s e-mail”.

And then there is the bridal shower. We went through a period where they were not surprise parties, the bride virtually took over the plans and stuck her bridesmaids with the bill, and bridesmaids resented paying way above their budget level for a party that they considered tacky or too extravagant considering they still had to pay for their travel expenses to get to the wedding. Now, brides are saying what type of party they would like, such as afternoon brunch, provide an organized guest list with guests’ addresses or e-mails, and letting the group decide on everything from the menu to the games. It’s the bride’s party to enjoy, but not to plan.

Why is this trend on the rise? Why have brides stepped back and allowed their bridesmaids so much personal freedom in all of the wedding areas? It’s a combination of personal experience (the bride has been a bridesmaid several times and never liked being bossed around), seeing some truly offensive selfishness of brides on television, and the fact that brides are choosing only their closest friends as their bridal party members. In this age of personalized weddings, there’s no longer a push to include his sisters who you’ve never met or including those who had you in the bridal party long ago. Everyone wants to be The Nice Bride, and they have a lot of trust and faith that their bridesmaids will make great decisions on their own.

Consider it the Golden Rule coming into play, as more brides consider their relationships with their bridal party members. This is not a time to boss them around. They’re doing the bride a favor, and now “ with gratitude being a key ingredient to any bride’s mindset “ the brides are acting with kindness, consideration and an open mind towards their closest women. I love letting them make their own decisions, says Kim, a bride from San Francisco. “My friends are all so stylish, I know they’ll choose something gorgeous. And they were so grateful that they weren’t being told what to wear. They said I was their favorite bride of all time!

Another category where the do your own thing approach is coming into play: allowing bridesmaids to decide which showers they’ll attend. In our global world, brides have multiple showers thrown for them. The first and main one is always by the bridesmaids, but then there are others thrown by friends and relatives. Traditional etiquette stated that the bridal party should attend all showers, but today’s bride allows her maids to pick and choose according to what works best for their schedule, budget and travel plans. So these extra invites are not a Must.

And finally, while the bride often gives the bridesmaids decision-making power over so many of their own plans for the wedding, there is one area where the bridesmaids still defer to the bride: the bachelorette party. The bridesmaids will plan a party to suit the bride’s style, not the other way around. So if she’s not a drinker, the bride isn’t forced to endure a pub crawl or a risque party with a male dancer. She may be a spa-going type of bride, so that’s what her bridesmaids knowing her so well will plan for her.

It’s a far more enjoyable thing to be chosen for a bridal party now that these new rules have come into play.

About The Author: Sharon Toris is a freelance writer and contributor to the top women’s and bridal magazines such as www.PashWeddings.com. She lives in Morristown, New Jersey. © 2007, Blue Grotto Media, Inc.

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